Foreigners Are Untrustworthy Christians

I am not a religious man. If people wish to believe in a God that is all well and good, but personally I feel no need for a book of magic stories and an imaginary friend to guide me through life. Why then, I wonder, does an acquaintance of mine, (and an extremely vague one at that) seem to think I would like nothing better of a Sunday than to dress up in a priest’s garb and pretend to be a man of the cloth?

This week saw the third time that I have been asked to perform wedding ceremonies for Japanese couples, and the second by this particular woman. The last time, I explained in depth that I am not a Christian and that my only experiences with churches have been attending weddings and funerals. That was foolish, as having been a wedding guest at real live Christian weddings in churches seemed to confirm that I was just the man for the job. She explained that she had been recommended a Mormon by someone, but she wanted a Christian.

“They are Christian,” I said. But she said she wanted a real Christian. “As I said before,” I explained, “I’m not actually Christian.” She said that didn’t matter as foreigners were Christian and they needed a foreigner.

“Was the Mormon Japanese?” I asked.

“No,” she said. “He was American but Mormons are chotto…”

I thanked her for her kind offer and explained that with my free time being precious, I’d rather pass. She said she thought I didn’t have classes on Sunday.

“No,” I said, “but I often have things to do.”

“What about in afternoons?” she asked. I told her afternoons were chotto

The woman didn’t seem to be picking up on my hints that I really didn’t want to do this, and asked if she could maybe call me again if they are short of people.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m sure you can find someone more appropriate.”

She hesitated and then told me that I had been recommended as a very trustworthy person.

“Thank you,” I said.

“And foreigners are not so trustworthy, so I really hoped you could do this.”

I apologized again, and despite having been told that I was Christian because I was foreign, and that foreigners were untrustworthy, I was the one who hung up the phone and felt guilty. Now, if that was a feeling I’d wanted I’d have embraced Catholicism in the first place.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s